Sad Times

i know its wrong. and i know i should feel this way. but i do. there is no way out. I'm being pulled apart on the inside. while on the outside i show nothing. i need out.
not being able to see my friends or even being able to get out of the house, sorry my mistake "house." I'm a prisoner in a place that i never wanted to be anyway. and i hate it here.
i cant feel anymore, anything positive anyway. there are no good feelings that surge through my body and i hate not feeling good about myself.
I'm irritated all the time and its taking me down. its dragging me down. and i don't know how much longer i can hold it together. and i hate not knowing if ill even want to get up tomorrow.
I'm surrounded by people who don't care. they look after themselves and that is. its not right when they have obligations. some people should never be parents, and i got stuck with two of them. not to mention a sibling that would rather see the world end than to extend her hand out t help someone. i fee nothing for them anymore, nothing but hate.
the majority of the people that fill this world are evil. and they take it out on people that stand out against the norm. its not right of them. and still they do it, not caring. we will destroy ourselves. and i don't think that day is too far ahead. this world is ruined and i hate it.
I'm in an ocean of sound. lost at sea with no map and no wind. i have no energy left to row. my ship will go down. and i have no voice to scream out, no on hears me anyway and i hate that.
I've got no will, no way and no say. what is life without. what has happened to me.
i hate everything.